Haha! to this day I still continue to wonder, how God is so long suffering with me.
He has hope for me (probably because he already knows my life), and he believes in me.
So if he believes this, how come sometimes I don't believe in myself?
have you ever been caught in that kind of situation? ughh, it stinks don't it? :)
Really this entire experience of me being broken and unable before Christ, has
been such an eye opener. I mean for the past few months, all I've wanted is peace,
and never knew how to obtain it. It almost feels like putting yourself in a box
for years; and enclose yourself in fear, insecurity, and doubt. Your skin is pale
white from the completely lack of sunlight (Jesus) in your life.
Anyhow, its not a fun experience.
But coming out of it is like breathing again!
its like being born again! Jesus is pumping through my veins. :)
I know this defintately isn't over..
but neither am I.
So I will continue to fight. With Jesus by my side.
Closing this chapter of my life, has really taught me to trust in God,
and let the Holy Spirit guide me! Open my heart and mind
to his words! Not letting the bonds of fear, insecurity, or doubt, bind me!
But one thing above all that I've learned for sure.. Is that, I can't do this on my own.
-mICH
why has the chapter ended? what made it end?
ReplyDelete:)
ReplyDeleteWell I first should probably explain what exactly this "chapter" is all about. haha!
Its about looking at my God for who he is. Because you see, for me he was someone I loved. I acknowlaged him in his power, and looked at him as my loving daddy who encourages me, and watches over me when I am afraid or anxious.
However I didn't seem to understand what was being asked of me as a daughter.
I must look like my father,
I must live like him,
and lastly, I must love like him in my life.
Living under these boundries however, was what puzzled me the most. I thought that I had to live for him based on what I could do.
But ah, I soon came to learn, I can't do anything! :)
So God was teaching me what he can do with a somebody, who is a nobody! If that makes sense. :)
Its a really humbling experience I must say! but it was very much, well worth it! :)
Btw, so sorry if I bore you with my lengthly explanations. ^_^ its just what was on my mind.
haha! that took forever and I didn't even explain why it ended. xP sorry about that. :)
ReplyDeletebut it was just when I understood what he was asking of me, and how to live life like that, to put it plain and simple. :)